On Saturday I was getting ready to attend my first charity gala here in Las Vegas to support St.Judes Children’s Research Hospital. I bought a beautiful long blue gown, a pair of silver heels and then went to get my hair and make-up done. I sat at the salon for nearly two hours and when it was finished I looked barely recognizable to myself. My face was caked in make-up that aged me incredibly. I’m 36, but looked a lot older. My eyes were so smokey that I had miraculously been transformed into a cartoon-esque raccoon. And what the hell is contouring? I had brown make-up streaks all over my face to create the effect of having had ‘work done’. My softness had vanished and I was my make-up artist’s definition of ‘fierce.’ Work it baby, work it.
I sat in the car before driving home with a heavy heart and wondered what my husband would say. Not that I needed his approval, but my time is very valuable and I just spent 2 hours being made to look like a total stranger to myself. It felt icky and I knew I had to take action.
Usually I like wearing very little make up at all – just tinted sunscreen, winged liner, mascara, rosy cheeks, and some sparkly eye shadow. I could barely see through the spider-like false lashes. My daughter greeted me at the house and said that I looked like Kim Kardashian. This was a very clear sign from the Universe I hadn’t quite achieved the look I desired.
Sean (my hubs) is the type of guy that tells me I look beautiful at the weirdest moments. You know, when I haven’t brushed my hair, or have a cold etc. My husband’s reaction was priceless. He was teetering on the line between wanting to tell me I looked beautiful and not wanting to hurt my feelings because I looked like something from the Rocky Horror Picture Show. We laughed a lot about it. With less than 2 hours until the gala, I decided to peel back the make up and soften the look. I couldn’t spend a whole evening hidden behind a mask.
A few dozen baby wipes swept over my face later, and a few minor touch-ups with my own make-up stash, I was feeling back to normal. See from the picture below that it was CAKED on and my eyebrows looked monstrous.
It got me thinking about people that walk through life thinking that they need to look a certain way or behave a certain way in order to gain the approval of others. The media bombards women with perceived ideals of beauty and profits from making people not feel very good about themselves in order to invest in the next big gimmick such as anti-aging cream, weight loss solutions and other “magic beans” that could never create sustainable inner transformation.
Self acceptance is magical.
The older I get, the less I give two flying fruitcakes about being like anyone else.
On the evening of the gala we walked through the Encore casino past lines of young girls waiting to get into a nightclub. There was an obvious uniform, which consisted of make-up to make them look older than they are (seriously, what’s the rush?), the shortest of short skirts, and the thickest energy of ‘see me’ and ‘make me feel visible and validated.’ Now don’t get me wrong, it’s an important human need to be visible and validated but when we don’t truly embrace our own uniqueness then it compounds into issues relating to our worthiness.
Sadly, young girls are the most susceptible to becoming lemmings. These girls grow into women that then have daughters that perpetuate the cycle of not feeling good enough. It’s sad, but we must send them love and compassion and not judgment, because life will change them. It changed me, I used to be the same.
When we don’t feel worthy it blocks the flow of energy to manifest the things we want into our lives.
We need to be our true, authentic self and allow our unique gifts to shine in the world. We need to teach our daughters (and sons) not to follow blindly but to tune into their own iconic nature and essence.
By loving who you are RIGHT NOW and not wishing everything would be different, then you are showing the Universe that you are ready for expansion. You are truly grateful for where you’re at in your life right now and that the present moment is nurturing you for the highest and greatest good.
A brave mother got up to speak at the gala about her daughter’s fight to beat cancer. The little girl was so beautiful even though she was missing hair, very pale, and had clearly been gravely ill. It was the beautiful perspective needed to remember it’s not about make-up, fancy clothes or the silly things we do to feel visible no matter what age we are – it’s the HUMANITY of love and compassion that we offer to one another no matter what the situation that will illuminate a beautiful path of consciousness to unfold.
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