Ever notice that your friend count is down on Facebook or that your Twitter followers seem to be dropping off like flies? Have you noticed those pesky little ‘unsubscribe’ notifications when you login into your email marketing software?
How do you feel when you recognise the names of the people jumping ship? Do you take it personally? Does it hurt your feelings?
Do you have crazy little conversations circulating in your head that outline random possible scenarios of why these people turned their backs on you?
Fear not. I’m going diffuse the drama and explain how to reframe this crappy energy and see it from the perspective of alignment (without resorting to flippin’ the bird like Liz Taylor in the picture above).
It’s taken me a bit of time to get thick skin about these things, but what I came to realise is that Oprah or Lady Gaga are way too busy to worry about the ever-fluctuating social media numbers game. I’d like to be like that too.
First off, let’s just examine all of the reasons why someone might unsubscribe/unfollow/unfriend.
- They might have too much clutter in their online lives and it has nothing to do with you. They’re just taking care of their own space.
- Your content doesn’t give them any added value. This is harsh, but if it’s the truth for them, they’re entitled to their perspective.
- Your message isn’t aligning with their energy so they naturally lose interest.
The age-old adage that ‘birds of a feather flock together’ is so true. It comes down to basic science: like attracts like.
What I’ve noticed is that when 5 people unsubscribe from the SarahProut.com list there will be almost always be 6 people that subscribe.
It’s a fresh new energy thing that means that on a metaphysical level my audience is getting strengthened.
You really don’t want someone listening to you or reading your articles if they’re going to poo on your parade energetically.
So see it not as rejection, but as automatic online spring-cleaning. Out with the old, in with the new!
If you have an approval seeking type personality…stop it. I’m going to be blunt about this one. Just stop it. You don’t need social media numbers (or anyone for that matter) to validate you personally, your business or your brand. If you’re dancing to the beat of your own drum and shining online in your own unique way, then you’re doing everything within your power to initiate the successful and sustainable growth.
In this game of online business, the key is to keep moving forward despite any seeming hurdles or hiccups. It’s important to thank your unsubscribers, unfollowers and ex-friends. They’re helping you to clear space for more amazing connections, friendships and kindred spirits to appear.
4 Comments
Thanks Sarah for this post…the picture cracked me up – such a good choice…yes I once got affected by this, but no longer…I now write my work with intent and energy and trust that the right people will find it and enjoy it…people change and maybe my online space does not resonate with them any more…I love your analogy of five unsubribe and six subscribe – you get a new energy…I love this as it is so true…wishing you love and light…love ur work xx
Intention seems to be the theme of the month! Thanks so much Claire! xx
Love this, Sarah. It reminded me of a Kathleen Hanna quote about disregarding internet haters:
“Beyoncé isn’t Beyoncé because she reads comments on the Internet. Beyoncé is in Ibiza, wearing a stomach necklace, walking hand in hand with her hot boyfriend. She’s going on the yacht & having a mimosa. She’s not reading shitty comments about herself on the Internet, & we shouldn’t either. I just think, Would Beyoncé be reading this? No, she would just delete it or somebody would delete it for her. What I really need to do is close the computer & then talk back to that voice & say, Fuck you. I don’t give a shit what you think. I’m Beyoncé. I’m going to Ibiza with Jay-Z now, fuck off. Being criticized is part of the job, but seeking it out isn’t. That’s our piece to let go.”
Hi Jess, I read this to my boyfriend Sean when we were in the car today. We loved it so much. Thanks for sharing. And you know, I have always adored Kathleen Hanna since her Bikini Kill days
xx